Buffalo Chili

Buffalo Chili

Not being able to replicate Esther's chili, this is an homage to her as well as South Dakota in general – hence the buffalo. Buffalo is getting easier to find, if a tad on the expensive side, but any meat will work, regular ground beef, turkey, and a finely diced tri-tip roast is also excellent, but may cost more than the buff. Even better news is that buffalo are making a strong come back, so there's no reason to feel guilty about munching on one in this century, though they are majestic beasts and I highly recommend a trip to Custer State Park in SD to see them on the hoof. My wife and I had little money at the time so it was nice to pack a lunch, drive out to the wild life loop in Custer and sit on the hood, eating lunch and the herds walked by – now that is quality time.

To be honest I rarely measure, preferring a “shoot-look-shoot” approach to cooking, that is to say I add and taste as I go along. I'll include a recipe for you to follow, but I highly advise, especially when adding spice, to add a bit and taste. This should be common sense, but I have found folks will take recipes as gospel and plop in the entire tablespoon of ground ghost pepper thereby rendering the dish inedible – even the coyotes won't take a chance with that. Salt is another one that people tend to dump in, probably because they see some schmuck chef on TV dump a handful of kosher salt in a dish and say it isn't that much, it looks like a lot because the grains are bigger, not willing to admit the dish is now inedible. Bottom line, taste all your spices so you have an idea of how strong they are, then start small and work your way up tasting as you go. Also, if you skipped this bit and went right to the recipe and it is way too strong, it is because you are an idiot. Just sayin'.

I added some non-typical things to the brew, including a can of original Rotel and a couple shots of whiskey, because the alcohol helps the tomato in the Rotel and the tomato paste release more flavor and the taste of the whiskey adds a nice undertone. I also changed up on the beans using dark and light kidneys and pintos, mainly because I really like pintos. You could be bold and even toss in some black beans, they work out well in most anything calling for beans. In fact eventually we'll talk beans exclusively because they are tasty (except for nasty Limas) and a cheap source of protein, especially handy while the price of beef is through the roof.

Buffalo Chili

2lbs ground buffalo (you can substitute Bison if you prefer ;) )

3 strips of thick bacon diced

2 32oz cartons beef stock

1 10oz can of Original Rotel ( a mix of diced tomato and chili peppers)

1 15oz can Dark Red Kidney Beans

1 15oz can Light Red Kidney Beans

1 15oz can Pinto Beans

1 5oz can tomato paste

1 small onion diced

1 tsp mince garlic

2 Tbs chili pepper

1 Tsp cayenne (for the love of whatever deity you fall to your knees for taste as you add this!)

1 Tbs brown sugar

1 shot of whiskey

1 Tbs canola oil ( you may need a bit more as buff is very lean so keep an eye on it).

salt and pepper to taste

Start by adding the oil to a hot pan and browning the diced onion, bacon, and garlic. You can add a couple pinches of kosher salt at this point. Once the onion is starting to brown up a bit add the beef and brown it up good. Once browned dump in the Rotel, tomato paste, whiskey, and all the spices including the sugar. Mix well and allow to simmer a bit, then add one carton of the beef stock (buffalo stock is tough to come by) and stir. Simmer for around 45 minutes stirring occasionally, tasting occasionally and adjusting the spices and adding more stock if needed – the meat should be covered. Simmer until thick, or dump it in a crock pot on low and let it ruminate for a couple of hours.

Browning bacon, onions, and garlic

Brown the buffalo

Add Rotel, whiskey, and spices

Add beef stock and simmer

It is so quiet, too quiet...

Well the fat man has sung, he's back home slipping Mrs Claus a little holiday cheer and taking all the credit for the elves hard work. Such is life, and hopefully life at home has calmed a bit and the garbage man has come to whisk away the mounds of wrapping, boxes, and toys that didn't make the cut, and your relatives are nothing more than a distant memory and some coffee rings Uncle “I Don't Use a Coaster” Ed left on the nice coffee table. Hope he enjoys his crappy thrift store ties emblazoned with “Welcome to Six Flags.” And now it is time to cobble together some meals with the leftovers.

The leftover tamales ( remind me to hide the good ones from the kids next time) pretty much take care of themselves. Little velvety pillows of corn and love made by the best tamale chef anywhere will disappear all on their own. The leftover ham and turkey are a different matter, though they can be viewed as finger food as Emily Post is dead and gone, we can combine some other things and hit most of the food groups and empty the refrigerator in doing so. Potatoes and ham, for instance were pretty much made for each other and can be resurrected as scalloped potatoes and ham. I know, I know it is actually escalloped potatoes and ham, but we called 'em scallops when I was a kid and so be it. Whatever you call them, ham, a cheesy white sauce, and potatoes are considered a delicacy in these parts, especially on a cold winter's eve. IF you happen to have some leftover pork roast hiding away, you can combine slices of the pork, slices of the ham, some pickle slices and yellow mustard, place them between two pieces of crust bread, slather with butter and heat them in a sandwich press for some fairly authentic Cuban Sandwiches. 

The turkey is pretty utilitarian and can be used in almost anything. My favorite way of using up the bits and pieces from the bird is to make a slice of toast, place it on a plate then top with a big dab of hot mash potato, then some sma

ll pieces of heated turkey meat and smother in gravy. Had a dish like that in diners and the school cafeteria, when school cafeterias cooked real food and didn't consider ketchup a vegetable. Push comes to shove you can drop the turkey bits in leftover Christmas Eve chili, or any soup, really. I've even dropped shredded turkey in with some refrieds, rolled them up in a tortilla and made turkey chimies or turkey enchiladas.

The most important device in your cooking tool box is your imagination (tempered with common sense) allowing you to visualize the leftovers, or any food for that matter as a part of a delicious whole. Develop some ideas combining leftovers, spices, and things on hand and go for it – your only tough task will be pawning all those dirty holiday plates, pots, and pans off on someone else for cleaning.   

A Simple Bowl of Chili

No matter what your mythology, whether a fat man in a red suit slides down the chimney, or an immaculately conceived baby was born in a manger or the god Saturn blessed your harvest, it is a season to celebrate. The celebration has nothing to do with the merchants trying to shore up their bottom line by twisting the story of the Magi to suit their purposes, but rather a time for friends and family, fond remembrances told around the table, the same old stories perhaps, but just as dear a the first time they were told. Food is a big part of this, it seems to bring us together, enhances the memories and makes us feel better in general – there is a reason it is called comfort food.

I was a young airman with and even younger wife when we met a wonderful family in South Dakota, the Rambos, and were taken in and virtually adopted. So are the folks living in that state, generous and caring folks, even taking in strangers for a night, as happened when my sergeant and I were stranded on a back road in a blizzard. The Rambos, and their daughter's family, the Parks accepted us into their brood and shared their stories and their love. Sadly the Rambos have passed, as has Esther Parks and the world is a bit colder for their passing. Before this becomes to maudlin, it is important to note that a very special feast was held each Christmas eve with Esther's chili-con-carne as the star of the show.

Anyone familiar with a Dakota winter will understand how warm and comforting a good bowl of chili can be on a bitter winter's night. And this was made all the better by being shared among a loving family. The chili was some of the best I have ever had and my efforts to duplicate it fall terribly short. Perhaps I lack the love Esther put into the mix, or maybe it is best eaten on a cold Christmas Eve in Rapid City to be really appreciated. Whatever the reason, I still like to make a pot of the spicy beans and beef as a tribute to Esther and to help bring on memories of one of the most wonderful giving families it has been my pleasure to meet.

So here is to you, your memories and the food that brings you comfort. I hope your holiday, whatever it is, will be filled with love, laughter, friends and family.

Requiem for a turkey

Well it's all over but the shouting, you've finally seen the back of all the relatives, and all that's left of the Thanksgiving feed is the last can of Who-Hash. Now to plop down in a comfy chair and let the healing begin so you're in one piece by the time X-mas rolls around. Tough to think of food at a time like this, but those turkeys turned out pretty nice, one started with hickory and finished with apple, the other started with apple and finished with cherry. Both came out juicy and tasty and this is a good time to recap why, and if really ambitious write it down for next year ( I am not that ambitious and besides, I cannot resist tinkering as I cook).

Slip me some skin

Edible non-rubbery skin is a good goal for any poultry project and salt is the answer, or at least part of the answer. This step does add to prep time, but salting the skin with copious amounts of kosher salt so the grains are very noticeable, covering it with some snarl wrap (aka plastic wrap, one of the devil's own tools), and leaving it in the fridge for 2 hours will bring the bird a long way down the crispy skin road. Once the time is up unwrap the turkey and rinse thoroughly to remove the salt and proceed with prep.

Fun between the membranes

Now for the really icky part, slip your fingers between the skin and the breast meat starting at the turkey ass-end and working your way towards the gobble, break the connections between the skin and the flesh. The idea is to create a stuff-able space in between the membranes so you can add stuff – what stuff, you might ask? Well, nearly anything from old gym socks to the entire contents of a lava lamp, but I'd stick to lubricants and herbage such as bacon strips and rosemary. I used both in my turkeys and they did add moisture and flavor to the bird, but by checking the “Flavor Bible” you may find other combinations that might suit your fancy, perhaps sage herb butter or vegetable oil and chopped garlic.

Get stuffed

I don't put stuffing in the bird, but the gaping cavity where the ass used to be does scream for some sort of filling and presents another chance to welcome flavor aboard the SS Rotting Carcass. I'm lucky enough to have a small forest of rosemary in the front yard and a lemon tree in the back, so my choices are obvious. If you're Hill-folk, you might be tempted to shove another animal, such as a duck up the turkey's ass and then shove a chicken up the duck's ass to boot. I'd stick to some sort of herbs and fruit personally, but experimentation is part of the process of growing as a cook so have at – bearing in mind that for all practical purposes you are serving this to fellow humans who might not care for the flavor of that smoldering “Tickle Me Elmo” that you inserted on a dare.

Hard Wood

While attempting to avoid any dick jokes, wood is important to the barbecue process and will add beautiful smokey over tones to compliment the other flavors you have forced upon the dead bird. Mesquite, the usual go to wood out here in the desert is way too bitter, so it is off on a scavenger hunt for other hard woods that won't overpower the fowl, such as hickory or oak. I used hickory chunks to lay the base of the flavor , then half way through the process switched to apple wood to bring on some sweet, and that worked well for my first bird. On the second I opted to start with the apple and then switch to cherry, which rendered a very sweet tasting flesh, quite nice in fact.

Fire it up

I use a chimney style starter to avoid having my food taste like it was brought to you by Shell Oil, and lay the coals down to provide indirect heat, that is a pile of hot coals on one side and a pile of hot coals on the other with a pan of liquid (in this case beer) in between. The pan catches drippings and the liquid instills flavor and steam to aid in moisturizing the boid. I cover the breast with a foil heat shield to slow the cooking of fore mentioned meat, which helps the dark meat get a head start while keeping the white meat moist, and who doesn't like tender moist breasts I ask? Towards the end of the process I mop the bird with some melted butter to aid in the crispification of the skin as well as the rich goodness of buttery, buttery butter.

TTFN

And here we are once again, at the very end of the tail, or Parson's Nose at it is called by our Appalachian brethren. Hopefully the information will help me to remember what I did next time, help you next Thanksgiving of if doing a turkey just for the sake of it – turkey is cheap and readily available through out the year, after all. Next we must set our eye's upon Saturnalia and try to figure out what to serve the next onslaught of relatives that will keep their mouths busy so one doesn't have to listen to all their crap. Just kidding, no really I am. I enjoy cooking and don;t get the chance to cook for groups very often so I do thank everyone for allowing me to inflict my lack of culinary skills upon them ever holiday. I'd also like to thank my grill, which even after fourteen long years still cooks like a champ.  

The Bird, the Whole Bird, and nothing but the Bird...

Though enamored with the boneless turkey roasts, my daughter decided that I should go back to the whole bird for the sake of the grandkids so they might experience the Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving of days gone by. I have to admit there is no romance in the boneless roasts, though they do resemble a football, which is appropriate considering the relatives sleeping through the Giants game in the living room. I had cooked the whole bird when my own kids were smaller. I used the oven, turkey bags (which work very well) , and finally the grill. Once I plopped ol' Tom Turkey on the hot grids I never looked back, though there was one episode that didn't go as planned.

Turkzilla

We were going to celebrate Turkey day with some friends and they said they'd provide the bird and so they did on the day of the festivities they brought over a monster turkey, perhaps the biggest I'd ever seen. The 23 pound beast did fit on my grill, however when I tried to put the cover on my Weber to commence roasting, it just rocked back and forth on top of the bird. The clock was running on this meal with only a few hours until meal time so I had to do some fast thinking. I tired jury rigging the grill by using bricks to prop the top, but that still didn't allow for covered cooking, so violating every rule in my microwave owner's manual, I stuffed the behemoth in the microwave and cooked the hell out of it, finishing it in the oven to get some brown on the skin. The fowl came out very nicely despite the unorthodox and potentially lethal cooking methods.

Prep

Getting the bird ready for the grill is half the battle, maybe even ¾ as the prep will help determine if the bird is a dry chunk of meat in a rubber bag of skin, or a moist bird with crispy golden hide. This is also your chance to introduce a bit of flavor by separating the skin form the breasts (carefully) and inserting various food related items. Herbage is always welcome, moisturizers such as strips of bacon or pats of butter are also a good addition, or for something off the scale try Martin Yan's Chinese Roast Turkey – possibly the most flavorful bird I ever grilled up. In fact I may do that this year accompanied with Yan's superb stuffing recipe.

As for the skin, salting the outside of the bird with kosher salt so that the salt is visible, then wrapping and refrigerating for about 2 hours puts you on the road to crisp skin. After the two hours, bring the bird out and rinse thoroughly to get all the salt off. Them pierce the skin with a fork and part way through the cooking mop the skin with some oil – olive, not motor.

Fire it Up

Once you have pimped out your bird the next step is to arrange indirect heat on the grill by placing coals on either side leaving an open area in the center. This open area is a great place to put a pan full of beer or water, you can use one of those disposable foil pans. The fluid filled pan will do two things, help with the moisture and catch grease from the bird. I like to place the bird on a roasting rack atop the grids, and clip the wing tips and tuck up the end of the drums, finally placing a tinfoil shield over the breast for the first hour of roasting. To be honest I use whatever wood I have on hand, generally mesquite, but starting with hickory or oak and finishing with apple or cherry would be the way to go. Maintain around 250-300 and use a meat thermometer stuck into the meaty part of the thigh to see how Ol' Tom is progressing. Remember for poultry you want the temp at 165. Generally I pull the bird when it his 160 and allow it to rest and cruise up toe 165 – remember you can always cut it up and microwave if the meat still looks a bit on the rare side.

Don't Poison Anyone

As with an food it is important to observe all safety guidelines – ignore these and you may well wind up killing guests instead of entertaining them. Go HERE  for some sound advice. I don't normally trust our government, but as they didn't name the item “War on Turkey” I figured it was probably going to be successful advice. 

Turkey Roast

Looks as though we may be doing the two Thanksgiving Day thing again this year. I don't mind a bit as it allows me to spend a lot of quality time with the grill, as I smoke my birds – the though part is keeping them lit. I've been doing turkey or boneless turkey roasts on the grill as long as I can remember. I know some who swear by deep frying their bird, but I have had it done that way and found it was nothing to write home about, not to mention the vast quantities of very expensive peanut oil and the chance of it all ending a spectacular fire. Okay, the fire would be pretty cool -- sometime I'll have to relate the story of the giant fireball I created (unwittingly) on my old Weber, that was nuts.

The boneless turkey roast is a snap, I prefer the ones with both dark and light meat, all wrapped in a net bag ready for the grill. I toss the gravy packet that comes with it out as I don't know what is in the pouch and I don't want to know. The roast is small, so I usually do several, one with a rub, one injected with olive oil, garlic, and Italian seasoning, and one just salt and pepper. I use indirect heat, with a pan of beer under the roasts to provide steam and additional flavor and I use hickory through the whole process, but they'd be nice if one were to finish with apple. I do come through with a quick mop of apple cider vinegar, brown sugar, and crushed red pepper. About half way through the cooking process. They cook fairly quickly, even with the grill kept around 250 so I use a meat thermometer and when I find the temp at 165, I pull the roasts cover with foil and let them rest. The temp should cruise up to about 170, the safe temperature for poultry. Don't be too ashamed to use the microwave if the bird still looks a bit pink, better your guest fall asleep in front of the TV than spending the rest of the day hugging the toilet.

Consider the roasts if you don't feel like dealing with a carcass, don't want your bird to wind up looking like a prop from a slasher movie after your attempt at carving. While the roasts don't have the romance of a Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving, they make up for it in less waste as they are all meat and they cook a lot quicker than a whole bird.

 

Talking the Talk, Smelling the Smoke

I never mind stopping for a bit to chat about barbecue – I will probably learn something new and the wondrous smell of smoking meat is free. I can't get enough of that beautiful smoke and can't learn enough about the art and science of smoking meat until tasty moist and tender. Speaking to the owner of “Hog Heaven” was no exception.

While sampling the smokey goodness coming from his smoker, I learned the fellow was from Missouri and we bemoaned having to pay for hardwood, especially because we both had haunted woods full of beautiful oak, maple, and hickory through our childhoods. Here in Arizona mesquite is easy to come by, but gives the food a little bitter flavor, part of it's appeal, though it doesn't work well with everything. Starting with hickory and finishing with some fruit wood was the plan he used and I can vouch for it being an excellent technique. Oak is good and can be found in Arizona, hickory not so much and I have yet to see any apple trees – lots of citrus, but I have heard the smoke from citrus wood is a trifle toxic, so I avoid it.

The proprietor of Hog Heaven had things to do so I left him to it, thinking about picking up a pork butt and smoking it over some hickory chunks and finishing it with some apple wood chunks I had at home. I'd also like to try tossing corncobs on like they do in South Dakota where corncobs are easy to come by giving steaks a nice finish from what I understand. I do use mesquite, mainly because my son-in-law has a mesquite tree and I get it for free, but I would still finish with hickory (purchase din chunks from a big box store. The trouble with Big Box Stores as a source for wood as they are all headquartered in places that have seasons, unlike Arizona where there's no excuse fro not barbecuing or grilling every day. The inflatable Santas and Christmas trees go up and the grilling supplies all but disappear – this happens around the end of September, but seems to get earlier every year.

Anyway, use what you have on hand, but don't be afraid to try something a little different if the opportunity presents itself. The final problem I had with finding wood for my smoker was trying to convince the flight attendant that my Shagbark Hickory stump was carry on...

Roll 'em if you got 'em: Tortillas

Finished (if thick) torillas

It is fun to try something new and wonderful in the kitchen, and I decided to take a shot at making my own tortillas with a recipe I stole off the interwebs. Normally I like to confer with the aide in my wife's class, a world class Mexican cook, but decided to just wing it this time. To share a shameful secret I have had a tortilla press stuck away forgotten in a cabinet for years. Always thought I'd use it one day, and that day finally came. Sadly I wasn't too impressed with the results.

The recipe called for the tortilla to be rolled out, but being a man I blew of the directions so I could use my toy, and truth be told the finished product came out thicker than I would have liked. Either I need to tune the press up a bit or swallow my pride and get the rolling pin out. I'll eventually get with my Mexican cooking expert and find out how she does it (which I should have done in the first place) and probably wind up selling the press to some other sucker. But I am getting ahead of the game here.

The first step is to bring the ingredients together. I've listed the recipe I purloined (my apologies to whomever came up with the original) at the end of this for your viewing pleasure – don't like the recipe, go steal your very own, there are a bunch out there. It's basically flour, salt, baking powder, oil and water, Nothing fancy, just basic stuff. The recipe instructs the cook to run the dough hook to ensure all the dry ingredients and then add the wet and mix away until the dough comes away from the side of the bowl. From there it's a matter of separating the dough into 16 balls of relatively equal size and allowing them to rest for a bit before rolling them out.

The process went smoothly and the dough came out well – now this may seem some pretty straightforward stuff, but I am here to tell you my baking sucks. I divided the dough into 16 balls o' fun and then squished them in my press – important note, I used a plastic cutting mat I vandalized by cutting in half to protect the plates of the press and also protect me because I am more than a little suspicious of the metal they used making the thing. After the first two I noticed it made some really cute tiny tortillas, suitable for diet tacos, maybe. So I took it upon myself to reconstitute a pair of dough balls in to one big dough ball and squishing them into a near normal small tortilla.

As I flattened one tortilla out I was cooking them on a cast iron skillet (AKA comal) flipping them when pale brown spots brown spots appeared on the surface. As stated earlier they came out a little thicker than I would have liked, but they tasted fine. Topped with some homemade refrieds, sliced olives, and cheese they were good to go despite being a bit thick and not terribly flexible.

After conferring with the expert and revamping my technique I will definitely try this again. It was a bit of bother, but I didn't wind up with a huge pack of tortillas and the ones I made tasted a lot better than the factory made ones. They do store well, so far, and I can pronounce everything that went into them. Once I get this perfected it's back to trying gorditas again (the first time was a bit of a fiasco, but the fire is out so no harm done). Looking for toppings/fillings -- pulled pork and brisket works really well...

Tortillas

3 cups flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 cup warm water

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Combine flour, salt and baking powder in the bowl of a stand mixer. With the dough hook attached mix dry ingredients until well combined. Add oil and water with mixer running at a medium speed. Mix for 1 minute, stopping several timesto scrape the sides of the bowl. After about 1 minute, or when mixture comes together and begins to form a ball, decrease mixing speed to low. Continue to mix for 1 minute or until dough is smooth.
2. Transfer from mixing bowl to a well-floured work surface. Divide dough in half, then in half again. Continue until you have 16 fairly equal portions. Form each piece into a ball and flatten with the palm of your hand as much as possible. If dough is sticky, use a bit more flour. Cover flattened balls of dough with a clean kitchen towel and allow to rest for 15 minutes before proceeding.
3. After rest period, heat a large pan over medium-high heat. Roll each dough piece into a rough circle, about 6-7 inches in diameter, keep work surface and rolling pin lightly floured. Don’t stack uncooked tortillas on top of each other or they will get soggy.
4. When pan is very hot, place one dough circle into pan and allow to cook about 1 minute or until bottom surface has a few pale brown spots. The uncooked surface will begin to show a few little bubbles. If tortilla is browning too fast, reduced heat a bit. If it’s taking longer than a minute to see a few pale golden brown spots on underside of tortillas, increase heat a bit. Flip to other side and cook for about 30 seconds. You want the tortilla to be soft but have a few small pale golden brown spots on surface. Remove from pan with tongs and stack in a covered container or zippered bag till all tortillas are cooked. This will keep them soft and pliable.
5. Wipe out the pan in between tortillas if flour is started to accumulate.
6. Serve warm or allow to cool for later use. When ready to use, place a slightly damp paper towel in the bottom of a container (with a cover) that will hold the stacked tortillas. Microwave, uncovered for 15-25 seconds (start with 15) or until warm, then cover to hold heat while serving.
7. The tortillas will keep well stored in an airtight container or zippered bag at at room temperature for 24 hours or can be frozen indefinitely. To freeze, separate tortillas with parchment paper or waxed paper and place in a zippered bag before placing in freezer.

Once again, my apologies to the original author of the recipe.

Preparing to squish and cook

cooking

Getting Sloppy in the Kitchen

First there was the lowly steam burger, nutritious but the blandest thing on god's green earth. It was a staple in South Dakota dished out of large hot Nesco Roasters, though I never saw its like in the WI of my childhood -- we had the “Sloppy Joe.” I grew to hate that thing, right up there with the Wednesday meatloaf with Special K cereal as filler. Not so much the dish itself as the constant repetition. Basically both dishes are another way to feed feed lots of people quickly, not exactly fishes and loaves, but a miracle in and of themselves.

Leaving mythological events behind, the Sloppy J became kind of a convenience food of it's time. A combination of ground beef, ketchup, Worcestershire sauce, sugar, salt, and perhaps a dash of hot sauce it was the 1,2,3, you're done dish of it's day. Now they have a box of crap with a goofy puppet hand on it you can add to your meat, but trust nothing that has spent most of its life in a box. They have made a stab at canning the Sloppy J as well, but with little success. Really there's no point as the dish can be made up ahead of time, or even spur of the moment it doesn't take but a few minutes. Brown the meat, pour off the grease, add the crap, stir until incorporated and and cooked through, then plop on a bun and voila, you're done. Not something I'd serve day in and day out, but good enough when in an occasional bind.

As my wife loves Sloppy Joes I make them primarily for her, though I will eat them however begrudgingly. I did upgrade mine a bit using a poppy seed hard roll, but kept fairly traditional beyond that.

1lbs       ground beef

1/3cup   ketchup

1tsp       brown sugar

1/2 tsp  Worcestershire

1/4tsp    hot sauce

salt and pepper to taste

I Can Beer Can

 

You won't see Beer Can Chicken on the menu at the Ritz-Carlton, there won;t be a category for it at the big barbecue cook-off, but this unassuming dish is as tasty as it is easy to make. There are two main ingredients, a chicken and a beer can doesn't get much simpler than that. It'd be handy to have a grill, doesn't even need to be a 500LBS cast-iron smoker in the shape of a pig, any grill with a cover will do as long as the chicken will fit upright when the cover is on.

The first step is chicken prep and it can be as involved as you like. I found a technique on line where you sprinkle the skin of the chicken very liberally with salt, wrap the rascal and place it back in the fridge for two hours. Now, I hope I don;t have to tell you to keep everything sparkling clean, including your mitts when you are working with poultry, if you don't realize this by now you've probably already killed someone (or they wish they'd've died). Don't go fussing about all that salt either because we're going to rinse it off really good later. The salt helps the skin retain water while breaking down proteins and helps for a crispier skin later in the process. A lot of chicken I've made and had tastes like it was wrapped in a rubber wetsuit.

Moisture is the key and anything done to help introduce it to the chicken is welcome. The can, besides acting as a cooking implement, is filled halfway with beer – what happens to the rest of the beer is up to you, but the beer will help flavor and moisten. To help the breast meat along, as it has a habit of coming out dry, is to gently work the skin away from the breasts and insert a couple slices of bacon, or if a porkophobe, a couple pats of butter. I will also make the bird a designer jacket to go over the breast in the initial stages of the cooking to allow the dark meat to get a head start.

You can introduce any flavors you like at this point. Shove herbage up into the cavity (remember to leave room for the can), give it a rub with your favorite BBQ rub or snake some herbs up in between the skin and the breast meat. Don't forget you can inject as well to bring both flavor and moisture into t he meat itself. I'm going to leave this bird alone, relying on the beer in the can to help to flavor and moisturize. If a first timer it might be wise to refrain from introducing too many variables at one time, just to see how it goes.

Time to set up the old grill. We'll be wanting indirect heat on this one, that is to say coals on either side of the chicken, but none directly under it. The can will be providing moisture, if you didn't drink all the beer, but it wouldn't hurt to put a drip pan under the bird to catch any escaping juices. Once the coals are hot and distributed, shove the can where the sun don't shine (on the chicken, that is) and use it as a stand with the legs to help stabilize the fowl, sort of a meaty tripod. Oh did I mention putting a bit of spray oil on the can to help with separation later? You'll really want to do that.

And now we slap the cover on and bid a fond farewell to our bird, trying to keep the heat between 250 and 300. I'll want the internal temperature of the thigh meat to be approaching 170 before I pull the bird, removing the can and covering the chicken with some foil to rest and cruise up to 170.

Now you're a real BBQ hero, the trickiest part of the whole operation is carving the bird and not leaving it look like a prop in a slasher movie. After adding this to your repertoire you can set your sights on the Thanksgiving Day Gobbler (not Cousin Frank, but the turkey) and introduce the big bird to your grill. .   

Mr. Chicken sporting the latest in foil fashion wear, which also help shield the breast meat and keeps the NSA from reading the chicken's mind. 

Taking the bird's temperature insures you won't kill any of your party guests with underdone poultry.